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Die Ouer Dame

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Ouer Dame: Is daar 'n probleem, offisier?
Officer 1: Ma'am, you were speeding. Offisier 1: Dame, u het te vinnig gery.
Older Woman: Oh, I see. Ouer Dame: O, ek sien.
Officer 1: Can I see your license please? Offisier 1: Mag ek u lisensie sien asseblief?
Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one. Ouer Dame: Ek sou dit graag vir jou gee, maar ek het nie ene nie.
Officer 1: Don't have one? Offisier 1: U het nie ene nie?
Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving. Ouer Dame: Ek het dit verloor, vier jaar gelede ... vir dronk bestuur.
Officer 1: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please. Offisier 1: Ek sien... Kan ek u voertuig registrasiepapiere sien asseblief.
Older Woman: I can't do that. Ouer Dame: Ek kan dit nie doen nie.
Officer 1: Why not? Offisier 1: Hoekom nie?
Older Woman: I stole this car. Ouer Dame: Ek het die kar gesteel.
Officer 1: Stole it? Offisier 1: Gesteel?
Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner. Ouer Dame: Ja, en ek het die eienaar vermoor en is stukke gekap.
Officer 1: You what? Offisier 1: Jy het wat?
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see. Ouer Dame: Sy liggaamstukke is in plastieksakke in die kattebak as jy wil sien.
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. Die offisier staar die vrou aan en rittereer stadig na sy kar en roep vir rusteuning. Binne minute is daar 5 polisie karre omsirkel haar. 'n Senior offisier stap nader na die kar, met sy een hand slaggereed op sy rewolwer.
Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle. Offisier 2: Dame, kan u asseblief uit die voertuig klim! Die vrou klim uit haar voertuig.
Older woman: Is there a problem sir? Ouer Dame: Is daar 'n probleem meneer?
Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner. Offisier 2: Een van my offisiere het my vertel dat u die kar gesteel het, en dat jy die eienaar vermoor het.
Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Ouer Dame: Die eienaar vermoor?
Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. Offisier 2: Ja, kan jy asseblief die kar se kattebak oopmaak.
The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk. Die vrou maak die kattebak ook, en daar is net 'n leë kattebak.
Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am? Offisier 2: Dame, is hierdie u kar?
Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. Ouer Dame: Ja, hier is die registrasie dokumente.
The officer is quite stunned. Die offisier is heel verbaas.
Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. Offisier 2: Een van my offisiere eis dat u nie 'n bestuurslisensie het nie.
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. Die vrou grawe in haar handsak rond en trek haar beursie uit en oorhandig dit aan die offisier.
The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled. Die offisier bekyk die lisensie. Hy lyk heel verward.
Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. Offisier 2: Dankie dame, een van my offisiere het my vertel dat u nie 'n lisense het nie, dat u die kar gesteel het, en dat u die eienaar vermoor en in stukke gekap het.
Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too. Ouer Dame: Ek wed jou daai leuenaar het jou ook vertel dat ek te vinnig gery het.
Don't Mess With Mature Ladies. Moenie met Volwasse Dames Mors nie.